How to avoid becoming invisible when you age
Add a smile (and fun glasses).
The “age before beauty” saying is a big fat hairy lie.
As my hair has silvered and wrinkles have become more and more defined, I now live in the age of invisibility, and am bypassed and overlooked at every possible opportunity.
But invisibility is not without advantages.
It is quite relaxing to not have to deal with attention. It allows me to be an unhampered observer, which I quite enjoy most of the time. I like quietly observing and I sometimes find it quite vexing when someone has the audacity to draw me into the conversation with small talk, demanding irrelevant remarks from me and interrupting my flow of people-watching. I usually avoid bothersome small talk by turning the conversation to books.
My favourite small talk killer is the question “So… what are you reading at the moment?”. It does wonders to deter unwanted attention, has given me many of my most precious reading tips from fellow book worms, and from the most unlikely individuals.
Who knew that the brewmaster of the local microbrewery shares my love of obscure sci-fi novels? I now look forward to any social gathering where he is present and eagerly seek him out to corner him so we can nerd together about our latest reading experiences.
Shared love of reading transcends age, gender and profession.
And who knew that the wife of an acquaintance turned out to be an avid fan of historic romance fiction and listener of audio books, to the point where she always listens to a book, even when vacuuming, and she eagerly shared with me her enthusiasm for the local library’s selection of audio books.
Instant friendship, right there!
The irrelevance of makeup
As I grow older and blander, most YouTube videos that pop up in my feed advocate that I should compensate by wearing more makeup. Let me tell you right now, that wearing makeup is no guarantee against feeling invisible. You just feel invisible while worrying about your mascara having smudged.
I have loved makeup dearly, but am kind of toning down the relationship a bit these days (by ghosting, mostly, as I don’t want a messy dramatic break-up).
I have gone the other way. I feel strangely liberated by the freedom wearing less makeup gives me. I no longer need to check the mirror to ensure that the eyebrow powder hasn’t been smeared in a triangle across my forehead because I have touched my face during an animated conversation, and I can take off my glasses and vigorously rub my eyes (ah, the pleasure!) without worrying about eyeshadow and mascara adding a raccoon-like quality to my features.
And to be honest, I find that a big friendly smile trumps makeup by a mile, every time.
The relevance of glasses
Yes, glasses.
Outrageous glasses, giving a very specific meaning to the word spectacles.
I am an enthusiastic advocate of statement glasses.
I am not talking full on Dame Edna Everage spectacles, but it’s time to stop playing it safe by choosing neutrals that “go with everything”. Chances are, if you find a pair of colourful glasses that look great on you, everything you wear will look good too.
Please note that any shopping suggestions are my personal opinion based exclusively on images on my computer screen, so keep those obvious limitations in mind when following the links, and use the return policy if the colours don’t live up to your expectations.
I am not an affiliate of any of the shops that I link to. I only do this because I am totally obsessed with showing you high quality clothing and interesting colours and style.